The Kat House

As the doctors work to determine the perfect timing of Cruella’s Percorten injections, she is required to have frequent vet visits to check her electrolytes. I took her for one of those visits this evening.

You may recall that among the many other afflictions she is currently dealing with, Cruella was recently diagnosed with MegaColon, an abnormal enlargement of the colon caused by its inability to empty properly. She is now on a high fiber diet and takes a stool softener twice per day. This new regimen has been keeping her regular for a few weeks now, and I haven’t noticed any ill effects – until today.

As I was walking Cruella toward the vet’s office, she suddenly assumed position to take a dump. I tried to rush her to the grass, but it didn’t work. She dropped a turd right there on the sidewalk! I assumed she was finished. Big mistake! While we were waiting for the doctor in the treatment room, she hunched over and dropped another one in the floor! Beyond embarrassed, I opened the door and told one of the girls what had happened. While she cleaned up the mess, I took Cruella outside. She couldn’t even make it to the grassy area behind the building. She just let loose in the middle of the parking lot.

Convinced that she surely must have an empty colon by now, I took her back inside. Just as the doctor and a tech walked into the room, Cruella took the biggest shit in recorded history. I’m telling you, folks. Somebody should have called Guinness. We all just stood there in total shock until the doctor finally broke the silence. “My gosh! That is the biggest I’ve ever seen!”

The sight of such a thing was bad enough, but the smell was even worse. I won’t even attempt to describe it, as I don’t think there are words in the English language that can do it justice. Let’s just say it sure as hell didn’t smell like Christmas cookies! The tech brought in an odor absorbing candle, and by the sheer grace of God, we all lived to tell the tale.

And speaking of the tale, it doesn’t end there. When I finally got back to the house, I took Cruella for another walk. She did it again!

At the beginning of today’s vet visit, Cruella weighed 59.5 pounds. The doctor told me that she should weigh 55 pounds, and that I need to limit her food intake until she loses a little weight. I should have weighed her again on the way out the door. I’m betting that she needs to gain weight now!