When is a Crush More Than a Crush?

Last night a friend and I had a lengthy discussion about crushes.  In particularly, we discussed just when a crush is more than a crush.  After much thought, I have decided to publish my conclusions.

Let us first define the word “crush”.  In my opinion, a crush is an admiration from afar.  Though crushes vary from person to person, there are certain “crush factors” that are usually present. 

Crush Factors
1.  The crush is admired from a distance.
2.  The crush and the crusher are not very acquainted with one another.
3.  The crush is usually unaware that he or she is being crushed on.
4.  The feelings are one-sided.

At any given time, I have at least a couple of crushes going on.  They are usually innocent enough – never really given much serious consideration.  But occasionally there is a crush that makes me question whether it is really a crush at all.  Thus the question, “When is a crush more than a crush?”

Let us examine my own “serious” crush using the aforementioned crush factors.

Rarely a day goes by that the crush and I don’t converse.  We talk for hours on end and share the intimate details of our lives.  He’s one of the best friends I’ve ever had, and I’m pretty sure he considers me the same.

1.  The crush is admired from a distance.
2.  The crush and the crusher are not very acquainted with one another.

The crush and I have discussed our crushes with each other.  He is my crush.  I am his. 

3.  The crush is usually unaware that he or she is being crushed on.
4.  The feelings are one-sided.

As I said, crushes vary from person to person, but some or all of the crush factors must be present to qualify as a real crush.  In this particular case, none of the crush factors are present.

So when is a crush more than a crush?

When your heart begins to race at the sight of an email from him.  When each day brings a new opportunity to learn more about his hopes and dreams.  And when you are inspired to be the best person you can possibly be – because that’s what he is.

25 Responses

  1. Max Coutinho Says:

    Hello Trish!

    Oh my…what a cool post!!! I sure did love this one…
    A crush is more than a crush when (what you described occurs but also) you hear his name and your heart races, when you’re near him and your palms sweat, you suddenly have a knot in your throat (you want to say those words, but you feel insecure), when you think about him all the time, and that exact thought makes you smile :) .
    Clear signs of “I’m in love” are blinking above your head lol.

    Very nice….

    Cheers!

  2. ~d Says:

    (wow) this is well thought out. I, umm, I like how you said…what you said.
    (thank you!)

  3. julian Says:

    wOw…you put all new insights on something everyone encounters….
    beautiful job… ~julian

  4. Mike Says:

    That was quite well thought out indeed, Tish! I think you could author an entire blog related to blog crushes :)

    Just what you need, right? Another blog :D

  5. Andrew Says:

    Just ask him out already, will ya???? Damn, teenagers…

  6. amy Says:

    oh…what a very fun phase you are in! what i’d give to go back in time and lengthen that process out for eternity! don’t rush it … I say fully experience the fun of …whatever it is :)

  7. Rudi Says:

    i like crushes. Even if the other one isn’t aware lol. Great post :-)

  8. Christy Says:

    Honestly this beats today’s episode of Days Of Our Lives hands down. This is just so entirely romantic…if you two keep it up I’m going to have to start writing poems about it.

  9. Barry Says:

    *sniff*

    *munches popcorn, waving vaguely for you to go on…*

  10. lecram Says:

    Wonderful post… lucky guy.

    Cheers!

  11. mizmouthy Says:

    SQUEEEEE! I feel all fluttery FOR you! I can hardly stand it!! LOL.
    This is so very awesome and exciting!

    And your post….so beautifully written!

    EEEEEEE! ~hugs~

  12. Andrew Says:

    Anyone else wondering where Tish’s been? Maybe she’s on a plane to meet Mr. MoreThanABlogCrush? Hmm….

  13. Mike Says:

    I’m pretty sure she’s at work right now ;)

  14. chattiekat Says:

    Max – Thanks for the nice words! :)

    D – Thank you! Glad you liked the post!

    Julian – Thanks! I’m on my way to check out your blog now. :)

    Mike – I never said it was a blog crush. It appears that everyone already has it figured out though! As for another blog, forget it! You work me too hard over on BlogsWeLuv. I have no more time! ;)

    Andrew – It’s not quite that simple! ;)

    Amy – Thanks for the kind words. And I have no intentions of rushing it. :)

    Rudi – Crushes rule. Thanks for the support!

    Christy – Wow. Beating Days of Our Lives is quite an accomplishment. I wonder if we’ll be the next Bo and Hope? ;) Thanks for the support!

    Barry – Don’t worry. I’ll be posting updates. :)

    Lecram – Thank you!

    Miz – Thank you so much! You’re the best!

    Andrew – Ha! I’m still alive and well in Knoxville, Tennessee. :) Sorry for making you have withdrawals!

    Mike – Darn you for installing that GPS on my car! ;) If anyone else has future questions about my whereabouts, just ask Mike!

  15. Flat Coke and Flies Says:

    I like the crushes that last a lifetime. They rarely happen but I wanna still get butterflies after the “new” wears off, ya know?

  16. chattiekat Says:

    Flat Coke – That’s a great thought. :)

  17. dan Says:

    That said, Just Friends is a really great movie – classic crush stuff.

    The big problem with crush-ing is the whole making it real or can it be real thing. I think the definition of crush implies that it never could be real enough to make it the real thing.

    Then again, based on my lurve life and lack thereof, I’m not 1 to judge.

  18. Polliwog Says:

    This made me cry Tish. Well done!

    I had this happen to me. The crush turning into not a crush, or more than a crush. It ended badly. I have now given up on crushes, men and love in general. I think it’s just not meant to happen to some people. Apparently my job in life is to spawn a zillion kids, turn them into exemplary citizens and then die. LOL.

    But that won’t happen to you. So don’t listen to me, Miss Molly Maudlin. LOL

    I have no clue who your more than a crush guy is, though if it is who I hope it is, I am more than ecstatic for both of you and I adore you both. And now I will go squeal like a schoolgirl because dang it, I’m all excited for you now! :-)

  19. chattiekat Says:

    Dan – I’ll have to check out that movie. Don’t think I’ve seen it!

    Polli – Thanks for the kind words. And yes, it’s who you hope it is. :)

  20. A little link love - Week Nineteen » Ordinary Folk Says:

    [...] When is a Crush More Than a Crush? – Tish writes a nice little article exploring just what makes a crush more than a crush and the factors involved. Wonder who her crush is?? If you’re new here, please consider subscribing to our RSS feed. [...]

  21. Mimi Lenox Says:

    Ahhhh…..blog crushes. I know all about them. Mystery, mystery……Great post.

  22. chattiekat Says:

    Mike – Thanks for the link love! ;)

    Mimi – Thank you very much! Aren’t crushes just awesome?

  23. Diva Says:

    AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

  24. Lissa Says:

    The weird thing with me is that when I experience Crush-Type-01 (the one sided minimal communication type), I tend to go completely crazy over that person.

    On the contrary, when I experience Crush-Type-02 (the one which involves more communication) I find my feelings for that person waning off slowly, and finally, the attraction disappears…

  25. Rolando Says:

    I think I get crushes when I read great posts. Is that wrong? lol.

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