Return of the Boyfriend Application

Boyfriend wanted. Must be loyal, caring, ambitious, intelligent, with a great sense of humor. Must respect the fact that I’m an independent woman without the need or desire for constant companionship. Younger guy preferred, but not required. Baseball fans, music lovers, and movie buffs encouraged to apply. Due to shortage of qualified candidates in the immediate vicinity, search has been expanded to include all of Tennessee, Kentucky, Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia, Alabama, and parts of Florida. Relocation is at your own expense.

Excellent benefits package for the right person after satisfactory completion of probationary period. I am an equal opportunity employer.

If interested in this position, please list your qualifications below. Why should I choose you over other qualified individuals? And what will be your first course of action if selected for the job?

16 Responses

  1. Gabby Says:

    Hold on – no requirement to be single?!

    Let me just fill in that application form then – oh damn, I’m not in the USA!

  2. Romeo Jensen Says:

    damn… let me know when you expand to Pennsylvania

    Happy HNT Gorgeous
    *Muahs*
    Romey

  3. Romeo Jensen Says:

    oh… just saw ur a big minor league fan LOL check out my blog from yesterday dealing with the altoona curve

  4. Ristak Says:

    Too funny! I think I need to put something like that one my blog!

  5. barefoot_mistress Says:

    WOW good luck with the man search! THanks for visiting my blog, and Happy HNT again!

  6. Tish Says:

    Gabby ~ I didn’t think I’d have the mention the “single” part. hehe. Pretty soon the search may be expanded to an even larger geographical area, so get ready! *LOL*

    Romeo ~ I’m flexible. Pennsylvania it is! haha! You’re just too cute! And I love the Altoona Curve post! :)

    Krista ~ Good luck if you give it a try! I think I need to do some advertising to increase traffic to my page. Any ideas? hehe.

    Barefoot ~ Thanks! I enjoyed your site, and you’ll be getting a mention on my “HNT Report” in a day or two! I really liked your photo.

  7. sasfdasfdljkfksdjkfjsd Says:

    damn, looks like Texas missed the cut :-(

  8. Tish Says:

    RayRay ~ I am willing to make geographical exceptions for the right person. ;)

  9. Benjamin Says:

    The fun part of this is that eventually you get to ask all those completely ridiculous questions of your applicants. The weird morality questions (the answer is always “no, I would not steal from the cash register”) (except that one time, when I was applying for an internship with Vinny The Crook), the irritating stuff like “what do you feel is your worst quality” (we all know it’s “I work too hard” normally, but I suppose in this type of interview I’d have to go with “I buy flowers too often” or “I’m self-concious about my 11″ tongue”), or the completely ridiculous “where do you see yourself in 5 years” (don’t say “doing your wife”).
    Good luck with the selection process, though. And try not to smirk when you’re saying something polite like “well, we’re still sorting through applications at this time, but we’ll keep your info on file and thanks so much for dropping by,” before carefully folding his letter into a paper airplane. Odds are good you’ll have an airforce decent enough to invade a small country. :-)

  10. Mike Says:

    Has the musician ban been lifted this time around? =p

  11. SCH Says:

    Thats pretty good. I may need to do one for a girlfriend!

  12. Tish Says:

    Mike ~ I love musicians! I do, but they are typically not the slightest bit interested in anything remotely remembling a serious relationship. But yes, if you can find me one who wants serious, then I’m all for it! The ban has been lifted! Well, perhaps it’s more accurate to say that the ban has been “modified”. hehe.

    SCH – Good luck! ;)

  13. Dick Says:

    Too bad the offer doesn’t extend to Texas.

  14. aughra Says:

    Huh, I have too many boyfriends to count….

    Of course, they are all fantasy ones… my myriad of celebrity boys.

  15. BTExpress Says:

    What’s the age limit? You forgot that.

  16. Femi-mommy Says:

    baby there is a shortage of quality candidates in every state…. try misery… er i mean missouri some time.

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